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These helpful tips & questions are provided to TheBigDay customers by Rev. Christopher Tuttle,
president of the National Association of Wedding Officiants,
an Officer and Chaplain of the International Clan MacFarlane Society,
and a past Big Day customer as well.
He's considered an expert in ceremony traditions and etiquette, and has been used as a source for
Brides Magazine, Modern Bride, The New York Times and Los Angeles Times, and is currently writing his first book.
Learn more about Rev. Christopher
from his blog
or his website, My Wedding Officiant.com.
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Will you be performing my ceremony?
Sadly, many independent wedding celebrants are now in this as a business and run referral companies.
They handle the interview with the two of you only to sub contract with someone else and send them to you on your wedding day
(some even spring this on you at the very last minute) and have paid them much less collecting the difference.
Will you expect to attend the reception?
Some Officiants not only expect you to invite them, they may even ask that their spouse or partner be invited.
This is common as they don't know anyone at your wedding but you and want company at the meal.
You need to know this for the reception headcount.
In most cases, this is an unexpected additional cost as per head charges can run very high.
Do you attend the rehearsal?
Many coordinators handle the rehearsal while some Officiants demand they do it without any interference from the coordinator.
Some include this service in their fee and others charge additional.
It's been a very big issue over the year as coordinators feel that this is their position, when it's really not.
You need to find this out early to avoid any issues. It really depends on you and how comfortable you are.
What do you wear?
Some Officiants can dress very formal while others dress very casual, some wear religious robes when your ceremony may be non-religious.
Others wear advertising? Ask! If you are having a themed wedding, ask if they will participate.
How much time do you book between weddings to make sure you are on time?
Another sad fact is; many Officiants overbook their day.
What will your Officiant do to prevent this?
Do they allow extra time between ceremonies in case of traffic issues?
What if the ceremony ahead of yours starts or runs late? Do you build in extra time?
And lastly, have you ever been late and if so, how many times?
There are many horror stories of Officiants that have been up to an hour late to a wedding and this should never happen.
The best thing to do is; call around and talk to on site coordinators and ask if they have worked with the
Officiant you are considering and if they have been late.
Is this all you do?
As mentioned above, some Officiants are in this industry just for the money and also perform others tasks.
DJs are also online ordained Officiants; photographers are also caterers;
florists are also coordinators; invitation makers are also photographers; etc.
How can anyone give you 100% on one of your most important and special day if they are doing two jobs?
How will this look to your guests when the Officiant then jumps over and becomes your DJ? How serious was your ceremony?
How many wedding ceremonies do you perform each year?
This is a very important question to ask. It simply translates to...experience.
There will be Oops and Uh-Oh's on your wedding day and someone experienced can handle these issues, large or small,
without anyone knowing there was an issue at all, in some cases, not even the bride and groom.
Ask what they do for YOU that other Officiants don't! What "plan B's" do they have to assure the little mistakes are going to be covered.
Will you be performing my ceremony?
Sadly, many independent wedding celebrants are now in this as a business and run referral companies.
They handle the interview with the two of you only to sub contract with someone else and send them to you on your wedding day
(some even spring this on you at the very last minute) and have paid them much less collecting the difference.
Some additional tips:
- During the interview process, make sure the Officiant is listening to you.
- Don't base your decision on price; the difference can be a ceremony you'll never forget OR a ceremony you'll wish
everyone would never remember. The ceremony is NOT the area to budget shop.
- Make sure the Officiant will present a ceremony that is a reflection of the two of you, not what he or she thinks you are.
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